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1 Returning for the Meal (Voyage) on Thu Jul 26, 2018 9:53 am



Voyage Name:Returning for the Meal
Participant(s): Solo
Description: Before Gideon had begun his adventures in Skypiea, he was hunting down a specific seaking that terrorized the cost of Jaya. In the midst of an epic battle between him and the seaking, a gigantic geyser sent the giant into the sky islands before he was able to deal the killing blow. Now that he has returned from from above like a fallen angel, Gideon now seeks to finish what he has started by slaying the beast and making him into a meal that he had been dreaming of since the day he first touched the clouds.

2 Re: Returning for the Meal (Voyage) on Thu Jul 26, 2018 10:32 am



go for it

3 Re: Returning for the Meal (Voyage) on Fri Aug 10, 2018 3:22 pm

Amelia Velts


Amelia Velts
For now on when grading you are to link the registration of the actual voyage to the voyage notification and not the thread. But regardless I'm your grader for this evening.

The thread itself was a nice read I liked the small interactions between you and Vizier about facing the sea-king, as for the fight itself it was also good to read, although I felt the sea-king wasn't as strong as you made him seem I suppose it was more so of the struggle of being slowed and fighting in water that made it difficult. The only thing I can really say to you is for each post please check your grammar and spelling as there were quite a bit in every post, otherwise good thread and nice read.

Onto the rewards of my 1/2

28,000,000M Beli

8,000,000 Bounty (The people of the town will be telling tales of how a giant defeated the sea-king roaming near their waters when the marines couldn't.)

+1 Prestige (Same reason as the bounty)

+1 Doriki (Fighting a sea-king in its natural element was difficult but you were already quite a deal stronger than it as you stated in the thread yourself.)

+ Novice Armament Haki

The battle overall wasn't something so shocking that I thick Haki armament haki is in order, but the regret it brought I believe was sufficient so I'm giving you a shaky yes for Novice armament Haki as for the crafting part, you didn't really learn anything new so it didn't really benefit your class but was more like a whim so I don't feel right giving CP.

2/2 Needed @Kaito, @Lady Sofia, @Melly

4 Re: Returning for the Meal (Voyage) on Sun Aug 12, 2018 7:34 am



I really enjoy your writing style. It's enough detail to get me into the story and enough of Gideon's thoughts to make me feel attached without feeling like I'm drowning in his head. The only thing I can request for the future is an increase in micro-details. Gideon swung his sword and created a spray of water, but describing the way he swung his sword, the way he tensed his muscles, etc. are things that can increase the hype in the situation. With all that you're doing right already, I just want to see how good you can get.

28,000,000 > 32,000,000 beli -- You're writing was solid and I don't think there's any reason to lower beli under the guise of substituting other rewards.

8,000,000 > 0 bounty -- No marines were involved in the voyage, nor do I feel like what you did would warrant marine intervention. All of your actions were offshore, doing no harm to the island or its people, yet earning their respect and admiration at the same time.

1 Prestige -- Stays as is, you earned it.

1 Doriki -- Stays as is. You earned it.

5 Crafting Points -- for feeding the island homies.

Busoshoku Haki awarded.

You weren't pushed to the edge in its traditional sense, you were pulled out of your comfort zone. Haki awakening at this moment wasn't there to make you strong or eek out a win, but to give confirmation to Gideon's reliance on strength. THAT earns respect, as a reader. Not only that, but he takes it and feeds the people of the island because he's just a good guy.

Really, really love Gideon and all that you're doing with him.

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